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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 07:54 PM Thread Starter
Ambulance Chaser
Join Date: Apr 2003
Posts: 21,825

Been thinking about you. Hope you and dd are ok. Click here to enlarge
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 08:34 PM
Ambulance Chaser
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 584
Doing Okay.
Just got back from Fla. with DD and I met with a counselor there who my Mom talks to. He really gave me some good ideas, including some ways to try to convince DH to go to counselng wth me. I am working on this. He advised me to try to get this accomplished as a reccommendation from our family doctor who DH respects and likes, so I am going that route.
Dh has been listening to me when I tell him that he is hurting my feelings. The counselor thinks it sounds like he has some clinical depression, but he was on antidepressants a few years ago and was not happy with how he felt. I think he tried Prozac and Welbutrin. Our sex life became practicaly nonexistant, which is why he switched to Welbutrin, but he stopped it as he did not like how it made him feel. I think he was on it for close to a year I did not notice a big difference.
He also thinks part of his problem is lack of communication skills. This is something he has to work on on his own. He reccommended a Dale Carnegie course. Getting DH to agree to this may not be easy.
And we talked about some of my issues and the things that I do that are not conducive to a good marriage.
The couselor advised me that we need to go back to being friends and enjoying time together.
My birthday is in Feb and DH and I are planning a weekend away, just the two of us to talk and to relax together.
Dh and I started as friends before we were a couple so we need to get back that side of our relationship where we want to spend time together and enjoy each other.

I feel ok about things right now.

Thanks for asking about me, it really does help to talk it out and get some advice and perspective on things.
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-12-2005, 10:18 AM
Ambulance Chaser
Join Date: Sep 2002
Posts: 476
Just a suggestion.
When I went to counseling, my therapist asked me to ask my then husband if it would be OK for her to call him in regards to me. She said that sometimes she would have a reluctant spouse come in to talk to her about the person she was counselling so that she could get some "insight" from a third party.
Very often, the reluctant spouse would ask her on their way out the door when they should come back.
She said she's had many people decide to go through counselling by using that method.
I never ended up doing that with my ex because of some different circumstances but I think it sounds like a good idea.
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-13-2005, 10:21 AM
Ambulance Chaser
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 584
Thats a good suggestion, thanks.
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-15-2005, 10:12 AM Thread Starter
Ambulance Chaser
Join Date: Apr 2003
Posts: 21,825
Thanks for the update. I hope your dh will agree to counselling.

I hope that you continue to go even if he won't.
Butchy is offline  

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