Can I vent about the 4 days it took me to deliver this baby? - Sybermoms Parenting Forum
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post #1 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-04-2007, 12:52 AM Thread Starter
 
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Can I vent about the 4 days it took me to deliver this baby?

AKA- If I were having another kid it would be a home birth most certainly or I would at least hire a midwife UGH!!

naturally, I ASSumed as this was baby number 3 it would go smoothly, and was I ever wrong. This was by far much tougher than my past two deliveries.

Started on tuesday when I thought my water broke MAYBE , or maybe I peed myself. I was pretty sure it was pee but it kept me up all night worrying so finally 4 am wednesday morning I called my on call ob who said why don't I just come on in and get it checked out.


So definitely it was pee, BUT I had very high blood pressure , protein in my urine and hyper reflexes PLUS a ton of THE BLOAt, SO they decided to observe me for 24 hours including taking my blood pressure every hour and having me collect all my urine in an orange jug for 24 hours to ascertain if I had pre eclampsia (sp).

SO I sent my DH and the kids home and started my observation at 8:30 am weds. morning, they came by around 4PM to visit me but that whole time I stayed alone because I was supposed to just lay in bed between peeing anyhow and try and rest and get my BP down, it really sucked.

thurs. am the doctor comes in and says because my BP stayed high all night they are going to put a pill called Miso (sp) on my uterus because right now it i snot favorable and that might induce labor, think my cervix out etc. they don't even need to check the pee I had so carefully collected for the last 24 hours.

so I called my DH and he made it there later in the day and mil took the kids, we thought we would have the baby on thurs.

6 hours and the miso did nothing, so they put me on pitocin at around 6 PM.

Pitocin all through the night and I had only dilated a few centimeters more, so they broke my water around 10 am friday morning.

ar this point I was on an Epidural BUT because it had made me itch so bad they had given me nubaine (sp) and it's pain relief was kind of reduced and I hadn't had my Zoloft since tuesday and I was feeling all sorts of messed up.

we live only like ten minutes from the hospital so the nurse said that they had ordered the Zoloft but maybe it might be quicker if SH just ran home (this was around 10:45), so DH ran home.

WELL wouldn't you know , no sooner had DH probably gotten on the road I started having a much more intense pain and my 12:08 the baby was born.

My DH missed the birth Click here to enlarge

my uterus was not co operating So they kept me on the pit. and removed my epi. etc.

I had already been in a lot of pain and I wanted to breast feed etc. so I asked for some ibuprofen or something for the cramps.

30 minutes go by and no nurse, by this time my DH had returned (he got there MINUTES after the birth) and he went and asked the nurse what was up and they brought me percocet, and since I guess after all this time in the hospital and my DH missing the birth and the fact that I was just feeling not very good about the entire birth I got kind of exciteable so when I finally made it to the recovery room (my BP had to get below 140) the doctor prescribed me Atavan(sp).

so they brought me the Atavan and more percocet and I was okay, but pretty loopy next thing I remember is another nurse coming in and putting MORE atavan into my IV and giving me more percocet and me kind of not really realizing what was going on, to MY NExt memory of them apologizing for over medicating me.



I swear I lost at least half a day and DH said I was talking in my sleep and he literally had to hold the baby to my breast to eat because I was so spaced out.

I am just SO disappointed with how everything went and so mad at myself for not being a better advocate for myself.

as soon as they said "pre eclampsia" I was in OMG MY BABY mode though and totally freaked, and then I was alone and in pain and the whole thing just sucked all around.

I know there are a million things I could have/should have done differently and I have been beating myself up all week.

in the end I guess I have my gorgeous baby boy but here I am in my third and last pregnancy and again I was induced etc. and I never got that "magical" birth experience so I guess I am kind of grieving for that as well.

OKAY

/rant
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post #2 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-04-2007, 07:14 AM
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Sorry it sucked so bad.

the boy is beautiful though.
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post #3 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-04-2007, 10:23 AM
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Wow, that sounds pretty sucky Click here to enlarge Sorry you had to go through it like that, and I really can't believe how they drugged you after the birth Click here to enlarge But I'm thrilled it all ended well and you have such a nice, handsome little snuggle bug Click here to enlarge
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post #4 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-04-2007, 10:32 AM
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I am so sorry for the difficulties.

That is a beautiful baby. Click here to enlarge
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post #5 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-04-2007, 10:40 AM
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The birth only lasts a short time, that beautiful boy is still with you! Enjoy!
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post #6 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-04-2007, 10:56 AM
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Don't blame yourself, of course you were worried. Congratulations.

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post #7 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-04-2007, 04:03 PM Thread Starter
 
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thanks you guys Click here to enlarge

I left out the part where I was anemic and couldn't leave the hospital until my hemocrit came back decent (22).

I was up again last night just still stressed.

the baby is sleeping, but I am not!

at this point it has a lot more to do with than any birthing experience and hopefully I get back on a normal routine.

maybe I can't sleep after being so tired for so long finally having energy??
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post #8 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-04-2007, 06:44 PM
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I'm sorry you didn't have the experience you wanted... but he is indeed VERY VERY VERY cute Click here to enlarge
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post #9 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-05-2007, 07:47 AM
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Good grief, Dunkin', what a cluster Click here to enlarge


I'm sorry it went that badly for you, and if I were you I would be demanding some answers. Why in the hell didn't they give you your Zoloft? What the hell with the double medication?!?!?!?!

In any case, the baby is beautiful Click here to enlarge
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post #10 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-05-2007, 06:19 PM
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I'm so sorry you didn't have the experience you wanted. Click here to enlarge It sounds like they were just screwy. Your little boy is indeed gorgeous. Click here to enlarge
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post #11 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-07-2007, 12:47 PM
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I hope you are sleeping and feeling better. I had a similar experience with my first -- pre-e, too -- and I kept replaying the whole thing in my head every time I tried to go to sleep. No joke, I had symptoms of PTSD throughout the first year. You didn't do anything wrong, and there wasn't anything you could do differently. I hope as you gather your strength these feelings go away. I'm sorry it was such a shitty experience. I've totally been there.
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post #12 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-09-2007, 09:54 AM
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it sounds like a bit of a mess and its understandable that you feel upset about it. you did everything you could do and did the best you could do in the situation. Congrats on your baby! take good care of yourself now. dont try to do too much too soon.
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post #13 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-09-2007, 10:03 AM
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I know that people say that the birth is just one event and the important thing is that baby and mother are both healthy etc, etc, blah blah. Yes, the most important thing is that you and the baby are healthy, and you are.

BUT, a birth is a momentous, life changing event. After all you are bringing a whole new person into the world. You want that to be a special event and have all these hopes for how it will go.

And when it is scary and things go wrong, it is disappointing, even when mom and baby are fine. You need to give yourself time to process it and grieve for what you lost.

I always pictured my births as being this exciting time and getting to meet my new baby, and doing something corny like singing Happy Birthday Baby, and I ended up with two preemie that I couldn't hold for days, and then another c-section and not being able to see my full term baby for over 12 hrs. After dds were born, like LoRo, I had symptoms of PTSD for months (their birth was really terrifying in a lot of ways), and even after ds was born, I was probably suffering from PPD. Looking back, I know I needed drugs after dds, and wouldn't ask for them. I did ask for them after ds and the dr convinced me that what I was feeling was normal.

Anyway, recognize that you have a right to how you feel and give yourself time to feel it. And tell your dh to be aware of the symptoms of PPD, although since you are already on zoloft, that might not be a problem.

Take care of yourself. Click here to enlarge
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post #14 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-18-2007, 06:23 AM
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I totally agree with STM. It's normal to feel cheated when such a monumental experience didn't go the way you wanted. I felt a lot of that with my first birth so I can totally relate.

Congratulations on your new boy! Click here to enlarge
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post #15 of 16 (permalink) Old 05-23-2007, 12:57 PM
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I can understand why you would be upset about having your last birth go that way. I had a c-section and needed medication for the pain afterward, but it sucks having to ask other people what your first hours with your baby were like, so I've been there.

He is beautiful though Click here to enlarge
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post #16 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2007, 10:46 AM
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My first and only birth was 30 and 1/2 hours of labor and a c-section. Nothing I learned in the childbirth class helped since I had an epidural and was on monitors from the get-go as I was induced.

Just remember, any time you bring home a healthy baby, its a magical birth. It isnt in how they get here, its that they get here. Congrats!
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