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More Support Than Your 18-Hour Bra Stunned friends? Illness in the family? DH grating on your last nerve? Whatever has you overwhelmed, come on in for more support than an 18-hour bra can give you!

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post #81 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 01:40 PM
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I think a child's life and well being trumps the support forum force field.

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Yup. And this is still sybermoms... we just won't take this post and make a call-out post later about it in the same forum Click here to enlarge And nothing in here is new news that hasn't been hashed out every where else.

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post #82 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 01:48 PM
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My perspective as someone who is adopted, with half-siblings who were not adopted with me, I have to say that I don't think it's as much a big deal as some people are making it out to be. You can do what you can do. I was adopted by my mom's sister; my older sister (who I didn't know about until I was 16--but that's a different story) went to her father's parents and my youngest sister who I was around for and spent time with went to her father's parents. I don't feel a big loss because of that at all. I don't have contact with any of my half-siblings (including the 7 on my birth father's side) and I am okay with that. I think if having Thor's brother turns into something overwhelming for Grace and she can't give him what he needs, then he should go to someone who can.
I think there is a huge difference between tearing apart two sibling, and growing fine and dandy without siblings you never had knowledge of. Click here to enlarge Click here to enlarge

I mean, if Mother called me today and told me that I had 4 siblings that I never knew about growing up, of COURSE I wouldn't miss them or feel crushed. Because I never knew them. Click here to enlarge
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post #83 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 01:51 PM
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I think a child's life and well being trumps the support forum force field.
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I think posting a thread on the ME linking to a support forum, kinda trumps the support forum force field. Click here to enlarge
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post #84 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 02:19 PM
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She did know her younger sister

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my youngest sister who I was around for and spent time with went to her father's parents. I don't feel a big loss because of that at all.
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post #85 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 02:27 PM
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I must have misread. (It was easy to do. Click here to enlarge) My apologies.

I think Jenny may be the exception. I hope these boys never have to find out. Esp. at an age where they have no understanding at all of what's going on and no one to explain to them.
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post #86 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 02:31 PM
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And totally of topic, but I swear to God Naomi, you must have a friend/acquaintance that has experienced absolutely every single scenario, ever. Click here to enlarge
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post #87 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 02:43 PM
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I clearly have a warped sense of the value of the sibling relationship. Maybe that's why I looked at people in confusion when they acted horrified that I didn't want to "give Caroline a brother or sister". I'm wondering if I love my sister too little or something.

To me it doesn't seem like it will cause long term harm to separate siblings at the ages of 2 and 4 if there wasn't a home that could take both of them. They clearly have already spent a lot of time apart. Ideally they would be kept in touch with one another and could build as much of a relationship as they chose to.
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post #88 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 03:17 PM
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You may well be right LC, and it will probably come to that, but it's not really ideal, is it. The best thing would be for them to be together, I don't see how anyone can argue that fact, especially with such a fractured family life.

Like Annie it's a hard nock life...

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post #89 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 03:50 PM
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And totally of topic, but I swear to God Naomi, you must have a friend/acquaintance that has experienced absolutely every single scenario, ever. Click here to enlarge

No, I do. Click here to enlarge


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post #90 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 04:04 PM
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To me it doesn't seem like it will cause long term harm to separate siblings at the ages of 2 and 4 if there wasn't a home that could take both of them. They clearly have already spent a lot of time apart. Ideally they would be kept in touch with one another and could build as much of a relationship as they chose to.
But even if they end up separated, you can't go in as a concerned adult and turn a blind eye to the abuse of one and only look out for the other.

You can't talk about ditching one the same you would a puppy that doesn't work in your house.

Five months ago she was expressing concern for Thor based on the what was going on with the older brother. She took thor, talked about getting custody of thor and was told if things were that bad CPS needed to be involved.

FIVE months later some random aunt called CPS not Gracie. Gracie had thor and apparently that was all that mattered. So despite her concerns for the living situation she only gave a rats ass about her own flesh and blood.

So IMO this is so far past what is ideal it's just depressing.

Rally around, support and give praise for the woman who left a kid in an abusive situation for 5 months and then speaks about tossing him like an animal.

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post #91 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-24-2014, 04:14 PM
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This whole thing makes me sad and angry and I agree with cosita.

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post #92 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-25-2014, 12:26 PM
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I didn't even know there was another baby besides Thor.


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post #93 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-26-2014, 07:23 PM
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But even if they end up separated, you can't go in as a concerned adult and turn a blind eye to the abuse of one and only look out for the other.



You can't talk about ditching one the same you would a puppy that doesn't work in your house.



Five months ago she was expressing concern for Thor based on the what was going on with the older brother. She took thor, talked about getting custody of thor and was told if things were that bad CPS needed to be involved.



FIVE months later some random aunt called CPS not Gracie. Gracie had thor and apparently that was all that mattered. So despite her concerns for the living situation she only gave a rats ass about her own flesh and blood.



So IMO this is so far past what is ideal it's just depressing.



Rally around, support and give praise for the woman who left a kid in an abusive situation for 5 months and then speaks about tossing him like an animal.

I'm not sure that's a fair assessment of the facts. If it is then she should have called CPS. But maybe she was afraid she would lose all contact if she did that.
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post #94 of 107 (permalink) Old 02-27-2014, 08:30 AM
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I'm not sure that's a fair assessment of the facts. If it is then she should have called CPS. But maybe she was afraid she would lose all contact if she did that.
You are right Ima. We really don't have all of the facts. All we know is what Grace has told us. And there are 3 sides to every story. Her side, the other side, and the truth.

I'm not sure if that makes this situation better or not.
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post #95 of 107 (permalink) Old 03-03-2014, 12:50 PM
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I hate when people do this. It's Monday, I wonder what happened with K?
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post #96 of 107 (permalink) Old 03-03-2014, 01:13 PM
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I hate when people do this. It's Monday, I wonder what happened with K?
Me too.

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post #97 of 107 (permalink) Old 03-04-2014, 10:28 AM
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I'm not sure that's a fair assessment of the facts. If it is then she should have called CPS. But maybe she was afraid she would lose all contact if she did that.
CPS doesn't barge in and say "hey gracie called us" which is why it's just speculation of "oh we think the aunt called this time".

And I'm pretty sure 5 months ago when Gracie was "going for custody" you were on the side of if what she was saying was true than yes, cps needed to be involved. Obviously, 5 months later with tales of starvation and abuse... cps needed to be involved.

How's her current pregnancy I wonder?

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post #98 of 107 (permalink) Old 03-08-2014, 02:22 PM Thread Starter
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Just an update for those who are interested....I told CPS I will take K as well. After reading every post, as hurtful as it was to read, I realized how horrible it would be to separate them two.

So, thank you all for setting my ass straight Click here to enlarge
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post #99 of 107 (permalink) Old 03-08-2014, 02:27 PM
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How is everybody doing?

General Immoral Fuckery
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post #100 of 107 (permalink) Old 03-08-2014, 02:31 PM Thread Starter
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The boys are doing really well with the foster parents. K is almost potty trained and I am in contact with the foster mom getting regular updates. She texts me about 3-4 times a week. Apparently, K may not be as severe as everyone thought he was. FM says he is doing very well, speaking small sentences, no meltdowns....it's like he's a totally different child than when he's with the mom. Thor is great...happy and eating like a little piggy Click here to enlarge

Had the home eval yesterday and passed. Am now waiting on the sw to contact me with the next steps.
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