If you are on my fb, you probably know that I post way too much on fb. I know this. For some reason, I can't bring myself to post about my mom. Which I don't think is unnatural but it also makes me the only person not sharing my mom's fundraising thing which has me feeling really guilty. I just can't do it. I just don't know how to put that kind of shit out there. What makes me feel even guiltier is that I am the one that led the fundraising efforts for my friend's little girl and I didn't think twice about it.

So my mom starts chemo and radiation on June 2. Radiation 5 days a week for I forget how long. Chemo 5 days on, 2 days off, 1 day on, 3 weeks off and repeat for a total of 36 treatments. She posted a pic of her ct scan and the tumor takes up so much of her lung it is scary. She has asked me to do pics of her and stepdad before she begins treatment, so that is the plan for memorial day weekend. She wants to have pics done after as well.

I have been a big crybaby mess who is set off by anything and everything. Its so completely not me and I don't like it. DH is trying to be supportive and he is being a good guy but I don't think he knows how to handle me like this.

Coral This all sounds so very hard. I never cry but I was also a big crybaby mess when my mom was going through her chemo and radiation. We didn't tell the kids for about 9 months so I spent a lot of time crying in the car, or the shower, or the bathroom, or in bed at night.... It's your mom and it's scary. Don't worry about not doing enough on FB.

I think there are some things that are too precious for Facebook. You haven't done anything wrong.

You're still trying to wrap your head around all this. . Don't be too hard on yourself. If and when you feel comfortable you can post about it, but if that time never comes that's ok too.

It's one thing to post, "It's rainy and I really don't feel like going to work today!" or, "Look at my cute kids!" than to post about this.