i just need to vent a little - Sybermoms Parenting Forum
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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-16-2006, 12:08 PM Thread Starter
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i just need to vent a little

i am really tired of being asked when we are going to have another baby. i just got back from a trip to see my (fucking annoying) family where it seemed like i was constantly being hounded about when the next kid was going to come along. the only thing i could think of to say was, "i guess we'll see!" and smile weakly while whoever it was went on and on about spacing kids closely or about how i should have more while i am still young blah blah blah.

i haven't told anyone in my life, save a few friends, about all the infertility/PCOS stuff, because i just don't want to talk about it. plus, i just don't think it's anyone elses business and i don't want their pity or questions or whatever.

i wish people would just stop asking and leave me the hell alone. they should enjoy the awesome kid i DO have and let me enjoy her too without having to think about the fact that she probably WON'T ever have a sibling and no, it's not because i think my family is "complete" or that i don't want to deal with two kids or whatever they respond to my response with.

/end rant

i need some ice cream.
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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-16-2006, 01:28 PM
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I'm sorry beetle. I've BDTD. I gave up trying because it just wasn't going to happen for us. The worst is when someone goes on about how parents with only 1 kid never understand how tough it is with 2--like it was my choice to only have 1.

I was married a long time before having dd. There was a woman at my job who used to ask me constantly after I got married when I was going to have a baby. I finally said to her "Olive, that is a very personal question". That was the last time she asked.

Have you tried the old "Why do you want to know?" or "Why are you asking?". That usually stuns them into silence.
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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-16-2006, 01:51 PM
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I figure unless someone else brings up the subject...there is no discussion needed.

I'm sorry they don't "get" it. You sound like you are at peace with this, I hope your family can get that peace also. Click here to enlarge
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-16-2006, 07:39 PM
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My close friends and family know about the problems we have had in the past year, so they don't talk about it EVER anymore. Which is nice, especially from my sister you would get this sad look and talk about how cj needed a little brother or sister and how I should give him that Click here to enlarge
Now we just have to deal with the neighbors who have to ask every.time.we.see.them.
My pat answer to people I barely know but who are just nosy is "I have the most wonderful kid in the world, who needs anything more"
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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-16-2006, 08:16 PM
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People who have never had issues with ttc just really don't understand. What's even worse is that when you do tell them, just to try and get them off your back, you will then get the good old "well you just need to relax.....if my husband sneezes I get pg.....do you need me to show you how to do it" bs that makes you want to stab them in the eye with a rusty fork.

Click here to enlarge
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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-17-2006, 01:05 AM
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Click here to enlarge i'm sorry that people are being insensitive.

Petition the White House to Adopt the Chartreuse Awareness Ribbon for the Prevention of Child Sexual Abuse.

"While there are many colors for various causes, (for example, Child Abuse and Autism both share the same color ribbon) there is no nationally recognized ribbon in chartreuse. Child sexual abuse affects so many children and yet prevention organizations struggle to receive the funding they need to raise awareness and educate people on all the simple ways we can empower our children, families, and communities against abuse."
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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-17-2006, 06:34 AM
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I have the exact opposite problem. Because my DS has special needs, I get, "You're not having any more kids, right?" Even though DS's disability has nothing to do with what DH and I did or didn't do. People just don't get it.
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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-28-2006, 12:34 PM
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Annoying but hopefully well meaning person: "When are you having another baby?"

Me: "Are you saying I'm fat?" Click here to enlarge

Them: "Click here to enlarge <stunned silence>"

Me: Flounce away looking indignant.

OR

"When are you having another baby?"

(a) We are waiting for the correct planetary alignment.
(b) The master says now is not a good time. Click here to enlarge
(c) I'm not sure. When are you planning to <have sex, lose weight, find a partner> again?
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