Oh shit, shit, double shit - Sybermoms Parenting Forum
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post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-22-2003, 06:01 AM Thread Starter
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Oh shit, shit, double shit

I missed it, I fucking missed it Click here to enlarge

I don't have what you call a regular sex life. DH and I both have pretty low sex drives. We can go a whole month and not have sex. But this month it was improving. We were making a real effort.

This weekend was my birthday, and as you probably know, I got pretty plastered. I also had my parents visiting, which put a dent in the bedroom shenanigans. I just checked Limey's stats, and according to that, I am cd18 Click here to enlarge

The last time I had sex was on Thursday. That would be cd14, if I have it worked out right (considering the time differences). I don't recall any EW, I don't even think I ov'd, but if I did, I only had sex that one time in the right part of my cycle. I just know I have totally messed up again Click here to enlarge

I know I need to be more active in the bedroom to even give this a hope of working, and I was so certain we would be able to do it. We have enough physical problems standing in our way, I can't believe lack of libido has to add to it Click here to enlarge I have no idea how to pick things up, I don't know what we can do to want it more, we have always been this way. Totally relaxed with each other, we adore each other, find each other very attractive, we just don't do 'it' all that often.

I can't believe i am even admitting this on a public board Click here to enlarge I am just so shattered that we have missed another opportunity, and really angry at both of us. Fuck, fuck, FUCK!!

I really needed to get that off my chest!
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post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-22-2003, 06:34 AM
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post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-22-2003, 07:26 AM
Victoria's Secret
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Oh....I'm sorry Click here to enlarge
post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-22-2003, 07:30 AM
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It only takes once Luv so you never know. Also, if you don't recall any EW then it's possible that you've not ovulated yet. I'm on cd 19 and still haven't o'd, though I think I am today.

As for your sex drive, I am the same way. After having ds mine went waaaay down. Have you talked with a dr? Perhaps they could give you guys some suggestions.

Click here to enlarge Don't give up hope.
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post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-22-2003, 08:15 AM
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luvmaboyz--- maybe you didn't ovulate yet.

When I was in the depths of TTCing [attacking hubby everyday for 10 days straight] we both would loss interest around the 6 or 7 day in.

For a female it doesn't matter so much, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, someone told me that fenegreek is a stimulant sexually. I didn't believe it at first but then I tried it. Not for myself, for my hubby. I cooked his favorite meatloaf with this "special ingredient". I can definitely say it worked. I didn't tell him about it because I didn't want him to "think" it was working. I told him a couple of days later. Click here to enlarge
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post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-22-2003, 09:53 AM
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Originally posted by Limeade
Have you talked with a dr? Perhaps they could give you guys some suggestions.

Click here to enlarge Yeah, I had low sex drive after #2 - after 15 months I went to my dr. about it. He said to go to the bookstore/library and check out books about marriage problems...he said that I "obviously was having marriage difficulties that caused me to not want to have sex and I was suppressing my feelings." Whatever! After I weaned dd my sex drive came back full force - it was just the nursing and hormones that made me that way.

In other words, make sure your dr. isn't a quack Click here to enlarge
post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-22-2003, 10:34 PM
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Click here to enlarge cd14 could have been your night. Good luck.
post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-22-2003, 11:03 PM Thread Starter
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*sigh* I know, it only takes once, but I am pretty certain I didn't ov yet, and now I am down, which makes my feeble libido even more feeble.

Fenugreet (or however you spell it) is a stimulant?? I might just try that. I have looked into some herbal supplements before, but most of them contain iodine and I am allergic. Nothing too sexy about a wheezing, itching, lobster Click here to enlarge I might look into that a little more and see how it goes.

I don't know which came first for us, the drop in sex drive (happened during out initial ttc phase) or the marital stress. WE generally have a fantastic marriage, but those very difficult 3 1/2 years did cause some long standing difficulties, for both of us. I really think that has a lot to do with our current bedroom situation, but I wonder if it is worth counselling, because everything else is great if that makes any sense.

We both hold a lot of resentment and confusion that is reflected in our sex drives, but outside of the bedroom, we adore each other. How fucked up is that.

We have both spoken to the dr, he was given anti-depressants and viagra. It seemed to help a little. I was also prescribed anti-depressants, but basically they made me dry up completely Click here to enlarge

Nevermind, I'll get over it I guess.
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post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-27-2003, 08:59 AM
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Fenugreek as a sex enhancer? I am taking 8 of those per day to increase my breast milk supply - hasn't done me any good in the sex dept. I have no interest whatsoever and DH will not agree to take any fenugreek - he will sayd "I don't want any milk coming out of me thankyou!"

All the best LMB - here's hoping you get PG soon! You know you can spontaneously O. http://www.usmev.com.au/cji.htm
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