For our daughter’s first year of preschool we were on the waitlist for our first choice preschool, so we went to our 2nd choice instead. When our first choice said they’d accept us for year 2 and 3, though, we said yes. When we told the current school we were leaving after year 1 they seemed disappointed saying our daughter adjusted well and was well liked by students and staff. We had no idea (and this was towards the end of the school year that they said this). We still decided to move on since first choice school had a better kindergarten prep program and shorter drive. Now we are about 5 months into the new school. Overall she seems happy and I’ve gotten positive responses from staff on her adjusting and playing well with others. We just had a conference with the head teacher, though, and she says my daughter plays one on one about 60% of the time and by herself the rest of the time. She said she doesn’t have strong friendships compared to others and is a bit shy. Generally when I walk into class she seems to interact with others and based on what I’ve heard from other staff during the year, I was shocked and confused. The first school never mentioned her being shy—if anything they said she had a lot of spark—although it’s possible they just didn’t mention it. I did see her playing alone and in groups at the first school, but I still considered her outgoing. I’ve asked my daughter and she said she likes the kids in both schools, but likes the first school more.
I’m feeling so conflicted. Should I just help her adjust better with play dates at the current school and stick it out? Or if my daughter likes the other school better is it weird to switch back at this point? If we switch back it would be for the remaining 4 months of this school year plus one more full year in the Fall. Switching back has its risks that the kids are now older and dynamics change, so it may not be as wonderful as she remembers. Or do I work to make the current school more enjoyable for her? I’m really torn and want to make the right choice for my daughter. On the one hand, we like the current school’s program more, so should we work on our daughter liking it more and hope our efforts turn out well? Or do I listen to her and let her switch back with there always being the risk of it not being perfect either?

How old is your child? It is not unusual for young children to participate in, what we call in education, parallel play. This is better defined as playing next to peers as opposed to interactively. If I read your post correctly, it sounds like your child has two years of preschool left? If your child is only 3, parallel play is normal from a developmental standpoint. I'd be more concerned with the teacher's knowledge of child development and credentials than my child.

Expect some tears. It can take anywhere from one day to four weeks, depending on their temperament, for a child to adjust to daycare, says Wittenberg. Until then, you might see a few tears upon pickup 💻😁👍

I understand you. My child and I went through exactly the same situation When my son was in kindergarten, our family moved from one city to another, which caused a lot of stress for the child. However, he was able to get used to it within a week.

I feel like my child needs to learn languages faster. What do you think of Duolingo as an app for preschoolers?

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Perhaps I am wrong, as I have little experience with children so far. I just started working with a girl on fosterplus.org just a month ago. But it seems to me that at this stage it is necessary to choose the prospect of her further development. Children are very mobile not only physically, but also psychologically. Perhaps she just needs more time to get used to the new peer group again. I believe that even if the child doesn't manage to find friends at school, but she isn't offended by others there, then this is also good. She could make friends in an interest group or among the children of her neighbors. She needs to stay in the school that will give her the best education.