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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 01-14-2014, 07:17 AM Thread Starter
Wayward Wombat
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What was I thinking?


I was semi-ooking for a job in the fall and I mentioned it to a friend of mine at my kid's charter school. (A school that I helped start by co-writing the charter application and getting startup grants 4 years ago.) I had stepped down from the board of directors and quit volunteering at the school a few years ago because of total burnout.

So my friend who is head of school and the one I worked closely with in the startup of the school, offered me an inticing salary and autonomy to work on a specific project, writing some very specific but sweeping policy and procedures for the school to comply with a new state law.

I accepted and got off to a good start - but I cannot bring myself to work on this project. It is so boring, I am in over my head, I need more direction than the HOS is able to give. I want to quit, but this the first paying work I have done in the past 15 years. I have been avoiding going in to work because I am able to just work at home, but i'm really not doing work at home either.

I need to just suck it up. My relationship with my friend/HOS is strained because I've been avoiding the work and talking to her. I suck. There's really no one else to do the work, I can't delegate it at all.
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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 01-14-2014, 08:10 AM
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Ok, I totally know where you're coming from. I'm in over my head, too, but it's with too many hours at too many places. I find myself wanting to shut down and let it just fade away, but that is my anxiety talking, and I know I have to keep pushing through it.

If I were you I would tell my friend the truth, that you've been avoiding work/her because you feel like you have bitten off more than you can chew. Explain that you are struggling, and could use more direction if possible, but that you committed to it and will get it done. Then you just need to hold your breath and take the leap. Force yourself to go in every day, no matter what. You will be far more likely to work if you're AT work. Break the project down into pieces and map it out on a calendar. (I don't understand what you're doing, so I can't reasonably suggest steps, but something like; on Thursday I will research existing laws and make a list of things we need to incorporate, etc.)

You just need to take this one step at a time, one hour at a time, one day at a time. Stop thinking about the big picture because that will only cause you more anxiety. Break it off into manageable pieces and hold yourself accountable for that piece each day.

You can do it. Click here to enlarge
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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 01-14-2014, 08:24 PM
Wayward Wombat
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Click here to enlarge with everything she said!

The goal-setting part and being in the office and being forced (Click here to enlarge) to interact with people can really help with motivation. I really, really, really hated having to go back in the office every day, but I actually look forward to going to work many days because I get to DO STUFF instead of just wait for my phone to ring and give the same answers to clients that I've been giving for 5 years Click here to enlarge

I try to balance "fun" work stuff with "boring" work stuff. So, maybe I have to do an OT calendar and schedule everyone for OT saturdays for the next 3 months. Click here to enlarge But I make myself do that before I go delving into "ok, mr. smartypants developer, you're wrong and here's why and I'm working on writing this in the nicest, most professional way possible and oh, btw, your boss and the director is cc'd on this email" Click here to enlarge

Sometimes, you balance your day & have a little fun; sometimes you go in, plow thru the plodding, plodding, omgkillmenow stuff just for the fucking sake of being DONE with that part (I'm looking at you, extended support procedures Click here to enlarge). And sometimes, you just decide fuck this shit, I am going to kick ass and take names today and make Word my bitch and then allasuden, it's time to go home Click here to enlarge
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