Will they thrive or fail? (School Separation) - Sybermoms Parenting Forum
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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 08-18-2007, 05:46 PM Thread Starter
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Will they thrive or fail? (School Separation)

Kindergarten starts in just a couple weeks. Tyler and Seth are going to be in different classes. I'm so stressed about how they are going to handle it.

Educationally I know it's going to be better for them (well better for seth). Tyler picks up on things really really quickly....he's basically on a 1st grade level and he hasn't started kinder. Seth on the otherhand, is on normal track for his age....he's just learning to read, sounding words out and whatnot, basic math skills. The problem is that Seth never has to work to hard at learning anything because his brother will turn around and give him the answer. So when he's in a class without his brother, he'll actually have to learn stuff so I think it's going to be great for him.

But i'm worried about the seperation. They've been together non-stop for the past 5 1/2 years. If you have kids who did separate classes, how did they handle the first few months being apart?
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 08-18-2007, 07:40 PM
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Our school separates. It hasn't been a problem at all. They have very different personalities.

On a funny note, one has a brother and sister in her class. The school didn't realize it because they have different last names (and not the same dad).

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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 08-21-2007, 09:30 AM
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I do not agree with mandatory separation in schools Click here to enlarge. which is why I will more than likely keep my girls in the oldest's school.

that being said, juni, just take it one day at a time for few weeks to see how they adjust. I bet they will do just fine Click here to enlarge that first time is the hardest.
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 08-26-2007, 07:00 PM
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Dds are together this year because we are doing Kindy readiness (sort of between pre-K and Kindy, for young 5s). Since there is only one class, they have to be together.

We actually considered that to be a drawback, because we thought they would do well apart. Ellie is an instigator and Emma is a bossy butt, so I think they would benefit from some separation. Click here to enlarge

I'm sure your boys will do fine.

FWIW, I'm pretty sure that our systems recommends separating them, but won't force it if the parents are against it. They asked me what we wanted to do if they went into reg K, anyway.
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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 09-16-2007, 12:22 PM Thread Starter
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I'm not even sure if our district has a recommendation on it. I know it was no problem when I requested for them to be seperated.

One funny though, when we went to the orientation, this one father of twins whose ds's are going to be in Seth's class, looked at me all weird when he realized I had twins in two classes. He said, "you're seperating them THIS early?" like I was committing a mortal sin. Dork
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 09-18-2007, 08:30 AM
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I think it is a very individual decision. I also think it is one that is best left to parents, not the school districts, especially in the first couple of years of school until they are seen by the teachers who can then have some input on what might be best for them. Until then, I want that decision to be in mine and my husband's hands. Twins are so vastly different in their interactions with one another.
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 09-30-2007, 07:32 PM
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My girls just started PreK and they are in the same class, but they don't sit near eachother. I like that they are together and our school systems tend to keep twins together until the parents are ready to separate them. I'm thinking by 2nd grade, I'd like them in different classes.
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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-05-2007, 09:44 AM
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My girls (identical) have been in class together until this year. I was really worried about them separating but I agreed with it. They need their own room to grow, their own friends, own methods of learning. I worried for nothing! They are thriving wonderfully! When I asked them if they missed seeing each other in class, they looked at like I had two heads & said, but we see each other at lunch! They are individuals.
Hope your experience is as good as mine has been.
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-22-2007, 07:31 AM
Yeah that.
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Juni, I'm curious as to how this is going.

The twins are starting pre-k next fall and we've been discussing this recently. We're having a tough time making a decision. The school has told us that it's totally up to us.

Initially I thought that surely we'd just keep them together unless a problem developed. That with them being opposite sex twins they perhaps wouldn't struggle as much with identity issues.

But we're seeing in their preschool class that Sam is very hesitant to complete anything on his own. Their teachers describe it as a lack of self confidence which I somewhat agree with, though I do think he's "behind" Mary Beth. I use the quotes because she's very precocious ... so it's not as if he's truly delayed, kwim?

She colors within the lines where as he could give a shit less. She wants to learn to write her alphabet properly and spell things (she sees her older brother doing this with his homework and it's killing her that she can't yet Click here to enlarge) where as he's just not interested at all.

In fact, we can't really tell what Sam's interested in. We're having the hardest time with him for Christmas.

So on that note, I think it would be good to separate them in case Sam's feeling pressure to perform like his sister. But the thought of separating them (this is stupid, I know Click here to enlarge) makes me sad.

Sorry for the length Click here to enlarge

I know we still have plenty of time to decide and that we can always put them back together the following year (or any year thereafter). But we've just been discussing it lately and DH feels we should separate. He's probably right. Just thought I'd get some thoughts from other moms.
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-23-2007, 01:05 PM Thread Starter
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What you wrote, sounds almost exactly like what Seth was going through. He is not delayed by any means, but Tyler is like superman when it comes to academics. He's reading, he's writing, and he's also mr. know it all. Seth basically spent all of pre-k saying he didn't know how to read, write, etc.

Well since Seth going into his own class without his brother he is THRIVING. Suddenly he can read (he could the whole time, he just knew he wasn't as good as tyler), he's writing. He's making up stories, his creativity is coming out. It's amazing, he's like a different kid. Putting him in a class away from his brother was the best thing I could have ever done for him. He's finally able to realize that the things he can do are great, and not have to deal with the constant comparisons to his over-achieving brother.

Best best thing I ever did. Now the fun part is that since they are both high-achieving, they want to put them in the GATE (gifted) program for 1st....but there's only one 1st grade classroom for GATE so they'd be back together. Haven't figured out what to do with that one yet.
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post #11 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-02-2007, 09:19 PM
Yeah that.
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Thanks for your response Click here to enlarge

We are still undecided but definitely leaning toward separation.
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