Tweens and bras - Page 2 - Sybermoms Parenting Forum
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post #21 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 07:11 PM
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I have lined barely there bras so I am not sure wtf you are talking about.


ďI donít know why we donít create some sort of system where we could train [Syrian refugees] to then go back to their own country and then fight for that country. Doesnít somebody have to stay in the Middle East and make the Middle East a better place to live?Ē

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post #22 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 07:12 PM
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http://www.essentialapparel.com/p/ba...Vo8P8HAQ#37142


ďI donít know why we donít create some sort of system where we could train [Syrian refugees] to then go back to their own country and then fight for that country. Doesnít somebody have to stay in the Middle East and make the Middle East a better place to live?Ē

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post #23 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 07:42 PM
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My 11yo is there too, both with the needing something with some thinner tshirts, and with preferring not to wear any sort of bra or double layer of top. If she's wearing a thicker shirt or sweater, I let it go. If she's wearing a thin tshirt, I tell her to put on a sports bra or change her shirt, because she doesn't need to show off her nipples to the school. (she giggles at that). Most girls in her class wear some kind of bra.
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post #24 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 07:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Twinklestars View Post
She hates bras, camisoles, and undershirts? Undershirts are regular t-shirts. If she wears a white t-shirt, she can wear an undershirt! The camisoles without the shelf bra or a tank top would work a little.
If she's like my 11yo, it's the double layer of fabric of an undershirt plus tshirt that she doesn't like. Each layer moves different and it feels "weird" according to her.
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post #25 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 08:49 PM
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^^I agree with Yes,Again's kid. The two layers (tank/camisole and shirt) feels horrible. Like they're both moving around in different directions, bunching up, clinging to my ribs...Click here to enlarge
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post #26 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 08:51 PM Thread Starter
Samantha Louise, 12 years old on 1/14/16
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I would like to address the larger social issue which iis that nearly everyone on this thread insists on the concept that a bra is a necessity. It isn't. Can we have a discussion about that?

And she doesn't have any of those stupid super sheer t-shirts, but I know what you mean.

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post #27 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 09:02 PM
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I've got friends that don't wear underwear on their tits because they have lovely perky boobs that haven't lasted for a decade. I'm insanely jealous. AFAIK they've never been harassed about their lack of bras.

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post #28 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 09:02 PM
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...haven't *lactated* for a decade...

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post #29 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-02-2015, 09:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wren View Post
^^I agree with Yes,Again's kid. The two layers (tank/camisole and shirt) feels horrible. Like they're both moving around in different directions, bunching up, clinging to my ribs...Click here to enlarge
I have to admit that I don't entirely disagree with her. Most bras are a more slippery material though, and should be fitted to the body so that they don't bunch up, move around, etc. I only wear multiple layers of shirts when it's really, really cold out and I'm going to be outside for a long time.

SquigSoup, I understand what you're saying. I don't make my girls wear a bra as long as they're not wearing thin tshirts, when a second layer is needed. I don't make them shave anything. They've both decided to shave their pits, but neither shaves her legs. They don't wear make up by choice, at least so far. On one hand, I don't feel like I should force them to conform to social conventions, on the other hand I feel like they should know what the conventions are.

The article you linked to about women who don't wear bras having perkier breasts. I suspect it's a chicken and egg problem. I've had saggy, non-perky boobs since I got above an A cup as a teen. That's just how they grew in. Running without a bra would have hurt when I was younger. Today I'd probably give myself a black eye. Click here to enlarge Some women have smaller and/or perkier boobs, so they don't bother wearing a bra because they don't need one as much.
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post #30 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 06:53 AM
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I think it's fine if she doesn't want to wear a bra. I don't think it's fine to be poking out of a white tee shirt though. So double up on that tee shirt.
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post #31 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 10:47 AM
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Huh. What I think of as the normal model of Barely There bra: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0065Q5WBU?psc=1&redirect=true&ref_=oh_aui_detailpage_o00_s00
It really is barely there. (Much like my tits.)

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post #32 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 10:49 AM
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Things I can't stand (and I've gotten more intolerant to bras over the years, not less): hooks in the back. Other things I can't stand: pulling on most sports bras.

Anyway, I feel like there's a lot more pressure to never ever EVER let the outline of your nipples show through clothing EVER than there was when I was younger, which is why almost all bras are now padded. It's probably largely of a piece with the idea that all ladies must be fully hairless from the neck down.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy.
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post #33 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 11:27 AM
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What would be the point of that kind? Click here to enlarge


ďI donít know why we donít create some sort of system where we could train [Syrian refugees] to then go back to their own country and then fight for that country. Doesnít somebody have to stay in the Middle East and make the Middle East a better place to live?Ē

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post #34 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 11:28 AM
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I am a b cup and like them lined.


ďI donít know why we donít create some sort of system where we could train [Syrian refugees] to then go back to their own country and then fight for that country. Doesnít somebody have to stay in the Middle East and make the Middle East a better place to live?Ē

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post #35 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 12:23 PM
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Squig I don't know how old your daughter is, I am assuming she is pubescent.I haven't raised a daughter but here is my two cents - My daughter can choose to go braless when she makes an informed decision about it which, in my mind, is not now. Right now it's my job to make sure she is dressed appropriately, so another layer is necessary when it would otherwise be blatantly obvious that she is braless.

In a perfect world this would be redundant, but we are far off the mark at this point, and I don't trust young people (and some old people) not to be rude and judgmental about her body. When she can handle herself and make the choice with the realities in mind, then full speed ahead. ftr, I went braless for a few years in my early feminist days (for comfort), but I always had a jockey tee under whatever I was wearing.

Anyway, Pudin was right on, it's just her unique lingo - one would think you'd be well accustomed by now. Puddy Click here to enlarge

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post #36 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 12:54 PM
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I went braless in my teens and 20s until I realized my tits were a thing of fascination for creepy old guys.

Dubby Click here to enlarge


ďI donít know why we donít create some sort of system where we could train [Syrian refugees] to then go back to their own country and then fight for that country. Doesnít somebody have to stay in the Middle East and make the Middle East a better place to live?Ē

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post #37 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 03:02 PM
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Quote:
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I went braless in my teens and 20s until I realized my tits were a thing of fascination for creepy old guys.

Dubby Click here to enlarge
This.

But I didn't go braless as I was a D cup in high school. Lots of unwanted attention, and seriously, nothing prepares you as a young teen for that, and I think I have actual PTSD from the catcalling that happened when I was way too young to comprehend what was going on, I just knew it made me uncomfortable.

DD is 13, and is a 32C already. She prefers sports bras over pretty much anything because they are more comfortable for her, but won't leave the house without a bra, even with a tshirt and sweatshirt over it. It's all about the kid's comfort level, but I am in the camp that at a certain point, there needs to be an extra layer of coverage there.

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post #38 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 03:34 PM
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I make my son wear underwear, even though he'd prefer not to, so his ass crack won't show whenever he bends over. Is that body shaming too? FFS. And yes, fuck you for making me agree with Pudin.
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post #39 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 05:37 PM
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Yeah how many of us hate pants? No more body shaming! The word can look at my cottage cheese ass all the time! Free my ass!


ďI donít know why we donít create some sort of system where we could train [Syrian refugees] to then go back to their own country and then fight for that country. Doesnít somebody have to stay in the Middle East and make the Middle East a better place to live?Ē

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post #40 of 52 (permalink) Old 11-03-2015, 06:21 PM
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Dd is 15 and has always been an A cup. She has buds basically lol. I insist she wears camis or something under even with a bra because most shirts they wear are V-neck and when she bends down, you can see everything.

Tapatalk is where the typos are at.
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