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post #1 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-03-2004, 03:31 PM Thread Starter
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Msercurxy's Pregnancy Journal

Week 5
Time to do this again! Hopefully this pregnancy will be mcuh less exciting than Quinlan's. Nice and easy and straightforward, with no surprises.
I started to suspect I was pregnant on Christmas Day, I came down with a stomach virus and was projective puking. I have never been so sick in my life. It was horrible. I am not a puking kind of person, I very seldom through up and the only time I've thrown up in my adult life, I've been pregnant or drunk. And I wasn't drunk on Christmas. Click here to enlarge
Anyway, Sunday I finally felt well enough to go out and by a pregnancy test (didn't want to alarm my husband by asking him to go get me one)--at this point I was4-6 days late. I tested Monday morning and was still sick enough I could barely read the strip (in retrospect, it probably would have helped if I'd turned on the light Click here to enlarge but it's hard to think of things like that when you are sick.)
Here's how I told my hubby. I wrapped up a present that had a note that said "I'm pregnant" on it. Then I took it too him and told him I found a Christmas present we had missed. He asked if it was like from 5 years ago like in Christmas Vacation. I just kind of laughed and he opened it up and he just kind of shrugged, he didn't get it! (Later he told me he thought it really was a several years old gift saying I was pregnant with Xena or Quinlan Click here to enlarge ) Right then, my mom unexpectedly shows up, and I tell him, "don't tell her" and then he gets it. His eyes get real wide and he says "you mean, you're pregnant right now?" Click here to enlarge
Well, I finally get over the stomach virus and promptly come down with a cold. Bleck. But other than that I've been okay, no more nausea/vomiting. A bit light headed today, but that is could be from lack of sleep.
I figure my due date will be August 31/September 1st, which is perfect timing. I'll take 12 weeks maternity leave and my husband will be able to finish taking his odd-ball classes that he hasn't been able to take because they conflict with my work schedule--maybe he'll even be able to finish out his Bachelor's by the end of next year!
When I told one of my friends, she told me she already knew because she'd had a premonition and that I would have a boy. We will see.
I know I felt much sicker with Xena than with Quinlan. With Quinlan, I felt like I wasn't pregnant at all at the beginning.
Even though I wanted this, and this was the 1st pregnancy I actively planned, I'm kinda scared. I guess it is too late to get cold feet now! I keep thinking, more kids than arms....what was I thinking? Will this really be a ton more work like my husband thinks it will? What if something goes wrong this time? But then I remind myself of all the reasons why I wanted to have another kid, and I know this was the right decision. I know our family will feel more complete with the new addition. Click here to enlarge
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post #2 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-03-2004, 06:43 PM
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Congratulatlons! Click here to enlarge

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post #3 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-03-2004, 08:54 PM
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Congrats Msercurxey! Click here to enlarge

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post #4 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-05-2004, 07:52 AM
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Congrats!
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post #5 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-10-2004, 11:07 AM Thread Starter
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Once again, I have to be "different" as one of my doctors told me.

I started bleeding on Tuesday. Just brown spotting. On Wednesday, the midwife checked my cervix and said it was closed and they drew an HCG (which was normal)
I started bleeding heavier on Thursday and had some cramping, although I would say it was "heavy" bleeding, just heavier then the spotting I'd had. Anyway, they did a sonogram on me Firday. Everything looks okay, from what they could see. The egg sac looks normally formed and a normal size (3mm, think how tiny that is!). The doctor couldn't see the baby inside it, but she said that is a limitation of their cheap sonogram machine, they generally can't see the baby until the 7th week of pregnancy. But if the egg yolk sac looks good, then most likely the baby inside is okay.
The doctor said my cervix was completely closed (which was good, the cervix would start to open up if I was miscarrying.)
My HCG test on Wednesday was 1981 (normal is anywhere between 1080-56000)--so one test by itself doesn't mean much (other than to say you are definitely pregnant), because the numbers vary so widely between women (and depending on what lab did the test.) What is important is that the number doubles every 48hrs, so my test today should come back around 4000--if that number comes back, then everything should be fine. Of course, they won't have today's blood test back until Monday.
But so far, inspite of the bleeding, everything looks normal.
I'm still bleeding, but nothing I can do except wait and take it easy and pray it all goes okay.

I wish now I hadn't told everyone I'm pregnant, until I was further along.

I am very happy with my clinic choice--2 doctors and 2 midwives are there. With my last 2 pregnancies, I'd went to a clinic with 3 doctors and 4 midwives--much to my chagrin they had a falling out on a Thursday and decided to dissolve the clinic the following weekend--2 days before I was to be induced. So I had to pick between the 2 new groups and I was not happy with that, since my doctor of choice went with one group and my midwife of choice with the other group. I did feel all the providers gave excellent care, so at least that wasn't an issue, but it was a hard decision to make 2 days before birth. So I made my choice, wondering if I'd made the "best" choice, and in hindsight, I probably would have been happy with either choice. This time around, the choice was easy, since I'd already made it, and I went back to the same group I'd picked for Quinlan's birth. And I am very happy with the choice and with the chances in morale in their staff. The staff seems so much happier and friendlier. Maybe all the rude people spun off to the other clinic, or maybe the stress of listening to the feuding doctors/midwives made the rest of the staff curt and rude. Whatever the case, I was amazed at the turnaround in attitude and very pleased at the friendliness the clinic now exudes.
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post #6 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-10-2004, 06:55 PM Thread Starter
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Oh I don't know why I bothered to tell my mother I was pregnant. I knew nothing good would come of that. First she tells me that I wouldn't be bleeding if I "took care of myself". I'm like, what are you talking about, I take care of myself, and she's like "no you don't".
Then she says "well, you don't want to stop a miscarriage, you don't want "it" if something's wrong with it." Yes, God forbid my mother has less than perfect children, because she can't except less than perfection. Oh wait, noone is perfect, no wonder my mother has never liked me. I assured her that I would love my baby no matter what, but that was beyond her comprehension.
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post #7 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-12-2004, 12:48 PM Thread Starter
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I miscarried last night. Last night the blood started gushing out of me, it was pretty scary, I've had heavy periods, but nothing like that. I went to the ER and started passing huge blood clots there. They drew my HCG and it had went up to 5700--if it was doubling right it should have been 8000. Even so, because it had went up from 1981 and because I hadn't passed an obvious eggsac or anything, they didn't want to official call it a miscarriage. I stayed in the hospital overnight, and I continued gushing until the middle of the night. I really wanted to keep hoping, but it was pretty obvious what was happening. The ER doctor and my floor nurse were wonderful, both of them had suffered through miscarriages themselves and they were very sypathetic. The did a sonogram on me 1st thing in the morning and rechecked my HCG levels. My HCG levels had dropped and "fortunately", I had completely passed everything so I didn't have to have a D&C. So they sent me home.
I know I shouldn't, but I keep thinking what could I have done differently? I really wonder if it wasn't from getting that stomach virus on Christmas, I was so sick, sicker than I've ever been in my life, and that would have been only 10-14 days post-conception. I've heard of other viruses mutating the fetus, so it makes sense that a virus so early after conception could keep the baby from ever developing right.
At any rate, I am sad. I'm glad I have 2 healthy kids, hugging them makes me feel better.
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post #8 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-12-2004, 12:50 PM Thread Starter
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I'll also add that I was lucky and had very little pain. Only some mild cramping.
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post #9 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-12-2004, 02:11 PM
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I'm so sorry, Rhonda. Click here to enlarge Click here to enlarge

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post #10 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-12-2004, 02:55 PM
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Click here to enlarge Click here to enlarge I'm so sorry.

I never thought I could...
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post #11 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-13-2004, 06:58 AM
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i am so sorry.

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post #12 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-13-2004, 09:52 AM
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Rhonda, you are in my prayers Click here to enlarge

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post #13 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-13-2004, 01:14 PM
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I'm so sorry, my prayers are with you.
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post #14 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-14-2004, 04:50 AM
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Ohhh Rhonda. Click here to enlarge I am so sorry Click here to enlarge

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post #15 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-14-2004, 05:39 AM
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I'm so sorry.
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post #16 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-15-2004, 10:22 PM
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Petition the White House to Adopt the Chartreuse Awareness Ribbon for the Prevention of Child Sexual Abuse.

"While there are many colors for various causes, (for example, Child Abuse and Autism both share the same color ribbon) there is no nationally recognized ribbon in chartreuse. Child sexual abuse affects so many children and yet prevention organizations struggle to receive the funding they need to raise awareness and educate people on all the simple ways we can empower our children, families, and communities against abuse."
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post #17 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-16-2004, 11:36 AM
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Oh I'm so sorry Click here to enlarge I was just catching up with everyone's journal today and saw this. Click here to enlarge
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post #18 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-16-2004, 01:50 PM
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I'm so sorry. Click here to enlarge
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post #19 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-16-2004, 10:13 PM
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Click here to enlarge Click here to enlarge I want to tell you, it took me quite some time to truly believe it wasn't something *I* did that "caused" my miscarriage. Really, you don't know it was the virus. It may have been. But it may have been so many things that were completely out of your control. Take time to grieve. This may be a good time to distance yourself from your mother, until you are feeling stronger. (Your mother sounds like she's cut from the same cloth as my mother.) Take care of yourself.

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post #20 of 20 (permalink) Old 01-20-2004, 02:43 PM
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I'm so sorry for your loss. Click here to enlarge
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