Did I overreact to this? - Sybermoms Parenting Forum
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post #1 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-25-2010, 06:27 PM Thread Starter
Wayward Wombat
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Did I overreact to this?

I am pretty sure Sam has colic because his afternoons and evenings are so difficult. His mornings are great but then he will cry for hours in the afternoon/evening. I have cut dairy out of my diet (except for a bit of cream in my coffee and the occasional bit of cheese) and it has helped his gas problems but he still is so hard to soothe in the evening hours. He is about 9 weeks old right now.

With that in mind, here is what happened. We had a really scary experience the other day. Totally freaked me out and I am still angry about it. We belong to the local gym and have brought our kids to the daycare there for the past 4 years or so. We have only had 2 problems in that time, both times I complained and they took care of the situation. We havent been to the gym much at all since I got pregnant with Sam. When we did go it was only to use the pool and not the daycare.

Anyway, since Sam was born we have gone 3 times. There is a woman who works there that I dont really care for; she is not personable or friendly and she never smiles, never says hello or talks or anything at all. I cant figure out why she works around people and kids since it seems like she is not a people person at all. My oldest daughter has always thought she is mean.

So the last time we went she was working in the daycare. I was really really clear that if Sam was difficult at all or cried that she could come get me and it would be no problem. I gave her some tips on how to keep him happy and showed her his favorite way to be held, etc. But I made sure to say a few times that if he cried a lot to just come get me and it would be ok.

When I got back 1 hour later, she was all weird when I walked in and in this fake sweet voice she said to my daughter Lucy (who isnt 2 years old yet)- "Lucy, where is baby Sam? Want to tell your mom where baby Sam is?" Lucy didnt answer and I couldnt figure it out because I couldnt see or hear him. The woman said Sam was sleeping in the other room. The other room is a small room about the size of a bathroom with a door with a window. The kids do art projects in there. The room was dark and the door was closed. I couldnt hear Sam until I opened the door, and I could hear he was screaming hysterically.

I couldnt find the light so I went to him in the dark with only the light from the doorway coming in. I was so freaked out because I couldnt figure out where he was or how to get to him. Picture this... he was in his carseat, loose, with his snowsuit on most of the way but partially unzipped. The straps were loose around his arms. His carseat was jammed into into a stroller they have, both facing in to each other with the canopy's up so they completely covered him. On top of that there were several, probably 8 or 9 large blankets covering the whole thing. They were tucked in and stuck around the whole thing so he was basically entombed. It was so freaky and stuffy and hot and he was screaming and overheating and it had taken me 4 or 5 minutes to get him out and to get the carseat out.

I was SOOOOOOOOOO pissed. The whole thing is a huge safety issue from the partially done snowsuit to the loose straps to the incompatible and unfitting stroller/carseat combo and all the blankets covering the whole thing. I cant even explain how scary it was and I was just so glad he was screaming so I knew he hadnt suffocated or strangled or anything. He also shouldnt have been shut in that room unsupervised.

I complained like you wouldnt believe. I was just so furious that she didnt come get me because it seemed pretty obvious that she was shutting him away probably because he was crying and she couldnt console him. I wish she had just come get me. Who knows how long he had been like that?! He was so hot he had heat rash and he had tears pooled by his ears and the hood of his snowsuit was wet. I know he had to have been crying a long time. The manager that I spoke to said she would talk with all staff about not leaving children unattended even if they are sleeping.

This is not enough for me. I am pre-paid for the gym for the next 6 months so I cant cancel but I could just stop going I guess. Although that would suck for me on a physical note since I am over weight. There are no other local gym options. So I dont want to stop going if I dont have to, I think this woman should stop working the daycare area since she sucks so bad, but the manager said she is one of their longest working employees and she hasnt had any previous complaints so "parents must like her".

Should I let it go and just not bring Sam anymore when that horrible woman is working the daycare or should I go above that manager to complain to someone else? Am I over reacting?

Sorry this is so long!

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post #2 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-25-2010, 06:32 PM
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Aren't child care centers like that regulated by the state?
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post #3 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-25-2010, 06:40 PM
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I'd file a complaint with the owner of the gym if the manager does nothing about it, followed by a threat to complain to the state. That's horrific, and a serious safety issue (not to mention emotionally awful).

I'd also ask for a schedule to know exactly when that woman works so you can avoid her (if they keep her on staff). Ugh.
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post #4 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-26-2010, 07:10 AM
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I would file a complaint with the owner, or the board or whoever has an administrative capacity. I would ask for my membership payment to be refunded, and I would file a complaint with whomever will listen.

I would also rip that woman a new one, tell all the parents what she did so they can be aware of what she is capable of, and I would continue to throw a hissy fit until she gets fired.
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post #5 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-26-2010, 07:12 AM
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And no, you are definitely not overreacting. Not by a long shot.
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post #6 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-26-2010, 08:41 AM
Yeah that.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 47 is Pleonasm View Post
I'd file a complaint with the owner of the gym if the manager does nothing about it, followed by a threat to complain to the state. That's horrific, and a serious safety issue (not to mention emotionally awful).

I'd also ask for a schedule to know exactly when that woman works so you can avoid her (if they keep her on staff). Ugh.
Click here to enlarge Click here to enlarge Click here to enlarge

I would be irate.

I'm doing it because she asked but I really do her.
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post #7 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-27-2010, 05:53 AM
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Click here to enlarge I'd have been irate as well.

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post #8 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-27-2010, 06:17 AM
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What troubles me most as I think about this was how creepy it is that the worker passive-aggressively (sociopathically Click here to enlarge) told Lucy, who isn't even 2 years old, to tell you where the baby was.

First of all, the worker damn well knew your not-2 year old likely wouldn't say. Second, the worker damn well knew that shutting a screaming baby away in a room, covered up like that, was wrong.

So not only did she provide really poor childcare, but the way she communicated the baby's whereabouts is extremely disturbing on a psychological level. I wouldn't want her near any of my kids ever again.
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post #9 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-27-2010, 07:22 AM
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No, you did not overreact. Go over their head and find someone who will listen... that woman shouldn't be working with little babies like that because she obviously has no idea what a dangerous situation was.
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post #10 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-27-2010, 07:40 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 47 is Pleonasm View Post
I'd file a complaint with the owner of the gym if the manager does nothing about it, followed by a threat to complain to the state. That's horrific, and a serious safety issue (not to mention emotionally awful).

I'd also ask for a schedule to know exactly when that woman works so you can avoid her (if they keep her on staff). Ugh.
Absolutely. I would have been beyond rage if I'd have found my baby like that, you have every right to be completely furious. She does sound like a psycho who should not work with kids at all. Keep complaining & going higher up until you get some sort of satisfaction.
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post #11 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-27-2010, 07:45 AM
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No you didn't over react and fuck that "daycare" worker for that. What a douche. I'm so sorry you and your child had to go through that. Click here to enlarge
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post #12 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-27-2010, 09:05 AM
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Short of seriously injuring her, I don't think there is anything that would be "overreacting" to that. No hyperbole--I would have had a screaming conniption, probably involving redfaced spitflying stuttering fingers pointing inches from her nose loss of all decorum.
And I'd have repeated that unseemly display for any supervisor who tried to tell me it was no big deal.
And then I'd go home and do the same, but in writing, and cc it to everyone I could think of, including the director, the depart of state welfare that licenses them, the local police, and, if it's a chain/franchise, the director of the company.
I want to do all that for you, right now. Click here to enlarge

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post #13 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-27-2010, 09:15 AM Thread Starter
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47 I agree it was so freaky that she did that. It immediately raised a red flag for me and was so bizarre I couldnt understand what the fuck she was doing. She said it in this creepy fake sweet kind of sing song tone that was totally unlike anything I'd heard from her before. And then on top of it I think she knew she fucked up because she left the room almost right away while I was still trying to uncover Sam.

I am trying to find out who the owner is and am waiting for a phone call back so I can complain. I am just so uneasy about the whole thing and dont ever want her watching my kids ever again. Click here to enlarge Well actually ANYONES kids because she clearly is a psycho bitch who has issues. Click here to enlarge

It still bothers me today, looking at DS and I just remember feeling so fucking grateful he was screaming so I knew he wasnt dead in there. It was such a horrible feeling trying to get through all the fucking blankets to try to get to him. I had no idea how he was setup in that mess and it was dark and I was just spooked. Click here to enlarge

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post #14 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-28-2010, 06:40 AM
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I'm not sure it's possible to overreact to that.
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post #15 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-28-2010, 07:02 AM
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Faster Pussycat said it so much better than I did.

I still get rage-y thinking about what she did.


I really hope you get to watch her be thrown out on her ass, and maybe even have some part in slamming the door or something.
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post #16 of 16 (permalink) Old 02-28-2010, 08:10 PM
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If that was me OMG it would not have been pretty.
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