Vents about weight gain from one with an ED
I am completely terrified of gaining weight when I quit. I have battled eating disorders my whole life and right now feel out of control thinking about gaining weight.
I try not to think about it but just writing this is making me cry. I can't figure out how to overcome the fear of weight gain (which is much more than the fear of quitting).
I know how vain and immature this sounds and feel stupid even writing it down.
I honestly just don't know what to do. I thought that I had gotten to a point in my life where my weight was not as much of an issue. I've gone through weight gain during pregnancies without problems.
I am a little heavier now, thanks to the holidays, than I normally am. Thinking about adding 10 or more pounds to that had me sobbing last night.
I can't believe that with two beautiful babies and a great dh I am stressed about gaining a few pounds in order to save my life.
What an idiot I be.