I spent over $30 buying junk to help, and nothing has so far, except for chloraseptic and ice. Being a nurse and having ass grapes that feel like they are growing by the second just doesn't go together. I am walking like I am 90 and having to sit down/stand up is freaking agony.
Yummy, I would be crying so much harder if I had vaginal grapes.
I'm getting my supervisor to ask another nurse who is on call tonight if she'd like to split a shift with me. My manager has offered to try and find someone to work in my place tomorrow night. It's pretty embarrassing to have to tell all my co-workers that I am not in labor - my ass is.
The one good thing is that here in the hospital, I have access to a peri-bottle (that I'm waiting for my supervisor to steal for me from L&D) and they have the peri-pads with built in ice packs - I just need to call up and see if she can snag some of those for me too. Also, there are gauze squares just the perfect size to soak in chloraseptic and apply to the area. If the Pyxis weren't locked down so tight, I'd figure out a way to snag myself some viscous lidocaine - I am just that desperate.